Reducing the Stress of a Post-Split Holiday Season
Once reaching adulthood, no one escapes the holidays stress-free, but this time of year can become even more challenging after a divorce. The holidays can bring up painful memories of happier times in years past, when you were still married. If you’re a parent, you may be concerned about your children’s happiness now that their parents are no longer in the same home. These concerns are legitimate and difficult, but there are steps that every divorced person can take to reduce the pressure they may be feeling, and to make the holidays fun again. Read on for some suggestions on reducing holiday stress after a split.
Make plans you can look forward to: After a divorce, it can be easy to fixate on the events that aren’t happening—parties with in-laws, or even holiday meals spent with your children, if they’ll be with their other parent this year. Instead of thinking about what was, focus on the fun events that are still on your holiday calendar, such as parties with friends you might have had to skip in years past due to family obligations. This is the perfect time of year to reach out to people with whom you may have lost touch during your marriage. You can even consider using the holidays to take a trip somewhere you’ve long wanted to go, so that you aren’t surrounded by reminders of holidays past, but instead are making new memories to treasure.
Ditch old, worn-out traditions: Families and couples can get into a rut of doing the same things, eating the same meals, and going the same places each year during the holidays, even when not everyone in the family enjoys them. If you and your kids always hated having ham for dinner, or going ice skating, you don’t have to! Shed the traditions that you didn’t enjoy and create new ones instead.
Don’t engage in gift warfare: Competition between divorced parents can take many forms, including a battle over who can get their kids the most lavish, vied-for holiday presents. Don’t go into hock to spoil your kids with over-the-top gifts. Instead, be happy for them when they excitedly tell you about the gift they got from their other parent, and focus on what’s important: being the loving, encouraging, and stable parent they need all year round.
If you’re facing divorce in Alabama and want compassionate, skilled legal help to walk you through the process, contact the seasoned and knowledgeable Guntersville family law attorneys at the Hawkins Law Firm for a consultation, at 256-571-2829.